Best Laid Plans (or Why Unscheduling Works)

Pardon me while I pat myself on the back for a minute. Yes, I am very good at organizing. I'm one of those annoying list-makers. I walk around with a list in my pocket at work so I can keep track of everything. I have to-do lists on the fridge, and stored in my phone. My calendar is always up-to-date and my schedule is carefully organized. Pre-children, I could even keep most of these lists floating around in my head without ever getting off track.

Anyone who has gone through the 0-5 stage with kids knows it's total chaos. As much as you might try to plan something, or have a "schedule" (ha ha ha!) it never works. Naps happen when it's least convenient, outfits need to be unexpectedly changed right when you're trying to get somewhere on time, someone is always hollering "I gotta pee" when you'd have to deviate 5 miles off course to find a bathroom.

I don't know why I thought homeschooling would be any different.

It turns out, kids are always very meandering little buggers (even after they are "school age"!). In a very simple sense this probably explains why ADHD is so over-diagnosed in the traditional school setting. What's that old saying? Always stop to smell the roses? Not when you're on a schedule! And especially not when you and 25 other kids who all want to meander in different directions are all on the same schedule! Jeeze, what were they thinking?

In the first week of classes here, the boys have already derailed all my cheerful attempts at efficiently planning a very organized learning process, and reminded me that learning is really an organic process (at its best, anyway!). I mapped out online lessons for Gavin, carefully counting how many I thought were reasonable to finish in a two-week span. He finished a week's worth in 2 days and wanted something more to do (subtly, somewhere, was that ominous threat that he was bored... omigosh no, anything but that!). My writing assignment for Liam was met with, "I really like this mom, but I don't know how to spell alot of these words. Could we make spelling lists for me to practice?" (Yes, believe it or not, they want to learn these things.)

So I've stepped back a pace, and really thought about what this homeschooling advantage means in relation to unscheduling everything. And, like all the years before this, I'm finding that when I relax my white-knuckle grip on trying to organize an unstoppable natural force (a.k.a my kids)... things actually go more smoothly. It's trickier, don't get me wrong. It requires a certain amount of spontaneity and following their lead as they learn something I hadn't planned on teaching that day. But it's a beautiful thing. Just yesterday, I gave Liam a 30 minute journaling exercise. He had a topic to write about. Two hours later, this is what he was still doing:

He had written about the topic I gave him, but then went and got a book that he'd picked out at the bookstore a couple of months ago called "Ask Me". It's a simple picture book, with kids'-point-of-view life questions like "Who do you miss the most?" "What's your favorite color?" "What do you like to cook with your dad?" He began going through and answering as many questions as he could that interested him. Along the way, he was frequently checking to see if he had spelled things correctly. (Notice, also, that he left the table and chair behind and wanted to use the piano bench as a desk). Eventually, after pages of writing, he tired of it and with a satisfied sigh he plopped down next to me to show me all his answers. Amazing. I just learned a bunch of neat things about my kid, and nobody had to coerce him to spend two hours practicing writing and spelling.

You tell me that can happen outside of homeschool.

Until next time... I'm off to unschedule a bunch of inspiring starting points. ;)